I honestly believed in you

People told me to run.

I listened.

There I tied my shoes and got ready.

I headed out the door.

Breathed in a huge sigh of relief.

Looked at the horizon.

Hung my head in sadness.

Took off.

I left you there.

In the kitchen.

I left before you had a chance to know I was leaving.

My heart was shattered before you.

For that, I am sorry.

I let him ruin me. 

He stole the very essence of who I am.

Everything that I had.

My trust was broken.

Competely. 

Vanished into a midst from all the tears that I cried.

I tried to tell you this.

You didn't fully understand.

I needed you too.

I needed you to take my hand.

Pull me in.

Hold me close in your arms.

Sweep the hair out of my face.

Dry my tears.

I needed you.

I never allowed myself to really fall for someone.

And then came you.

Out of nowhere.

You fell in my lap.

You had me from the moment my blue eyes met your brown eyes. 

I wanted to know more.

When I did, I wanted to fall.

Fall into you.

I saw so much potential in you.

You were everything that I thought I wanted.

I slowly began giving you pieces of my shattered heart.

Something suddenly didn't feel right.

I felt like you didn't care.

In the morning I would wake up with mascara on my pillow.

In order to protect myself from another broken heart,

I ran.

I ran before I thought I cared about you.

But I was wrong.

Because now here I am.

And I miss you.

I wish I didn't push you out so fast.

But I did.

All because I was scared.

Damn it.

I don't want to be scared.

I just want you to prove me wrong.

To be the one to show me that there is someone out there who can treat me right.

I don't know why it hurts to bad.

I don't know why its so hard for me to just let it go.

I think I know...

I honestly believed in you.